


Dark and Handsome

by LilLightskinBullet



Category: Final Fantasy VIII
Genre: Coming Out, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, F/M, Gen, M/M, Past Relationship(s), Sad with a Happy Ending, Shounen-ai, Sorceresses, Spells & Enchantments, Squall Leonhart being Squall Leonhart
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-23
Updated: 2020-12-24
Packaged: 2021-02-28 02:55:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,611
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22856602
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LilLightskinBullet/pseuds/LilLightskinBullet
Summary: Squall Leonhart , wakes up one day and just stops pretending. Rinoa isn't happy to have her perfect world crushed. Eventual Seifer x Squall.
Relationships: Rinoa Heartilly/Squall Leonhart, Seifer Almasy/Squall Leonhart
Comments: 2
Kudos: 26





	1. Sorting it out

Squall's POV : It's gotta stop 

Nothing felt right. It ached. My normal every day life ached. Waking up next to her, my internal feelings cold and lifeless, but I wanted to love her. I wanted to feel something towards her. But I don't, and it hurts. Everyday pretending, everyday plastic. I've forgotten why started I pretending or if maybe at one point I loved her and it faded over time. Guardian force faded memories or not, whatever we had was gone. I can feel it as I scoot away from her in our shared bed. Watching her sleep didn't fill me with warmth and comfort, just unease and restlessness.

I think to myself, why am I here? Why did it get so deep? I answer myself. In my mind I owe her. In my mind, it's what's expected. I was the hero saving the sorceress and ended up being her knight. She saved my life, and I owe her my heart. But that's the thing. Did I want to be saved? Why did I have to owe her?

Back there in time compresson, when I called out, and pleaded with my heart, I ended up back in Mattron's Orphanage. When Mattron sent me away I was in the void. I accepted it, I was alone in my heart. That's when Rinoa came to me. I was surprised I took it, as if she was the closest to me. But when I think about it now, was it ever my choice? Did I ever choose. No she used her power. I was home, because she wanted me home.

It scares me, to think about it. Is there a spell for, false infatuation? Did she curse me? Why have I only woken up now? All these thoughts stream through my head during this middle of the night rush of thoughts.

This is all complicated. I don't like complicated. I need to end it. I need to just talk to her. She's a friend first right? 

I would find later that I was wrong, I was so good at pretending, at this point, I thought that for a second that Rinoa would be fine not having her way, in her perfect world. 

To be continued....


	2. Love me more

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Squall takes a walk then goes home but add in stress.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Third person y’all

Squall Leonhart swung his sword as crisp fall leaves flew to the ground from their weak already winter ready branches. He wasn’t focused, his thoughts were filled and his gaze fell off to the distance. The was supposed to be a peaceful training grounds, he could always focus here but today even while training Squall didn’t feel at peace. Everything felt foreign and strange. He’d woken up confused ,and conflicted. There was one thing on his mind. Rinoa. 

Not how it used to be. When he used to think of her his heart would feel light , full of joy, comfort, and genuine care. Now it was heavy, it all felt heavy. The thought of sleeping next to her another night, feeling restless losing sleep. What ever was there before between the two had disappeared and Squall could feel it strongly in the past month. He felt wrong. He felt that they should always be together given their story, but Squall couldn’t even kiss her without feeling some hesitation and regret. He just couldn’t place what changed.

She was his sorceress and he was her knight, she ruled and reigned and brought prosperity to the world, why he “lovingly” protected her with his life. It all seemed picture perfect, it wasn’t. It had been going on for five years , they had grown, Rinoa was more mature but in many ways the same childish, free spirited girl he’d met those years ago, and he, well Squall couldn’t really track his own growth, to him he’d been the same since he’d made his resolve to start depending on others... but, now he felt alone once again. There was no one he could speak about his turning feelings, no one who could understand and not question him, judge him. 

He could already hear Selphie, Zell, Irvine and Quistis all chastising him for feeling different , they’d run their mouth cause a stir in Rinoa like a soap opera. Ending his train of thought there Squall gave up on training he had been in his head for the past 10 minutes just watching the leaves fall to the ground. He walks from the training hall out towards the entrance to Balamb garden, Squall briefly thinks of seeing Rinoa to maybe relieve his sense of doubt, but at the moment she was working with Balamb garden to figure out how to use the spells Ultimecia used. Learning more about spells that have to do with space and time would be very beneficial for the entire world. Squall was sure if used correctly it would lead to many scientific discoveries and technological advancements. Of course if used correctly. He didn’t want to be a distraction so he wondered around.

It was mid day and Squall couldn’t think of a single thing to do, he walked and walked past everything bland Balamb garden, upon reaching the edge he thought of Rinoa needing to be guarded but something inside of him turned and he told himself she’d be safe in the garden. He’d only wonder a little bit out of Balamb and just maybe get some air, see some trees and clear his mind of his doubts. Exiting Balamb Squall saw a small clearing of trees and decided to sit down on a tree stump, there was a small creak bubbling and Squall could hear it as he heard other insects and animals getting ready for winter. He closed his eyes to listen when he heard a cough. Then a curse. Squall looked around to see a figure of a man, he paid no mind and closed his eyes when suddenly he heard

“Hey Leonhart” from a very familiar voice. It was him, it was Seifer Almasy. Squall looked up to see Seifer leaning on a tree taking a drag of a cigarette. Observing Seifer’s new habit Squall spoke.

“You’re here” Squall said quietly. Looking down not really able to meet with his eyes Squall was shocked and felt relieved, He hadn’t seen him in about two years, he was a fugitive, seen as a traitor. They’d run into each other in a bar in Dollet. They talked well Squall listened, he was never good with words, Seifer had told him of staying under the radar and just being able to clear his mind of the events past, it helped some that Seifer had been tipsy and Squall had needed the company that night after being overwelmed with being the Sorceress’ Knight and leading Balamb garden. That night he told Seifer about how he felt. He never talked more , he completely opened up, both of them did and for some reason they both showed a little hesitation upon meeting again. Never the less Seifer spoke.

“Yeah why are you?” Seifer asked walking closer to Squall and leaning on the tree he was sitting next to. Squall wasn’t expecting a question but, he felt more comfortable suddenly, and he decided to answer honestly.

“I needed to get away I guess” Squall answered calmly with a sigh. Seifer laughed , and Squall looked up at him. Seifer shook his head.

“Trouble in paradise?” Seifer asked after taking another puff of the cigarette in his hand. Squall frowned and turned away from the other man. Seifer shook his head.

“Look when you do that it sums it all up, I hit a nerve huh?” Seifer said confidently. How could he even tell” Squall thought to himself. Seifer continued.

“Look...” Squall started and then stopped not really knowing if it was the right move to really talk about what was going on in his life but maybe just maybe he could change the topic and somehow get some kind of reassurance on his doubts about Rinoa. 

“I’m looking I see a bullshitter” Seifer said side eying Squall. There’s a bit of silence when suddenly Squall comes forward.

“What was it like with your Sorceress?” Squall asked suddenly Seifer froze up. 

“Well shit.. I felt clouded. Everything seemed fine. I really was twisted back then, see Matron ... I thought I should protect her it wasn’t really my romantic dream... in short after all was said and done it was .... in short... a fucking disappointment.” Seifer said putting his hand to his chin really thinking hard about it every thing.   
“Okay” Squall responded not really being satisfied with Seifer’s answer, he wanted to ask about how It felt to be under a spell but couldn’t bring himself to ask. Seifer continued.

“It’s not like what you have, Leonhart. You’re living the romantic dream” Seifer said smiling. Squall felt his frustration swelling up.

“You’re wrong.” Squall responded. Seifer looked surprised. There was silence once again before Seifer spoke again. The sun starting to go down a bit and the air getting cooler.

“How?” Seifer finally asked putting out his cigarette and moving closer to Squall. Feeling a little cornered Squall looked away at the blonde man directly in his line of vision.

“...” Squall stayed quiet and looked down. Seifer sighed.

“If you can’t tell me who can you tell? Those lame friends of yours?” Seifer asked in an antagonistic tone. Squall was frustrated with himself. Why couldn’t he just talk.

“I’m having doubts about Rinoa and I.” Squall finally says completely giving up. Seifer stayed quiet Squall continues. 

“Like I woke up just ...”Squall started, but Seifer finished for him. 

“Confused, and conflicted... like everything you did wasn’t your own will?” Seifer finished.

“I don’t know, I don’t feel right.” Squall confessed. Seifer no longer looked entertained Squall would describe his look as concerned and hurt. This is a look Seifer never had, not in any if Squall’s memories. Seifer grabs Squall’s arm and looks him dead into his face. 

“What are you doing tomorrow ?” Seifer says suddenly almost desperately. Squall looks away from the mans gaze and wondered why he could be so worked up. He answered.

“Tomorrow Rinoa and I are going to Galbadia garden to discuss some things with the garden leader. ” Squall answered flatly no hesitation. Seifer put his arm around Squall. Looks him into his eyes and spoke.

“Make some time for me, I’ll be here 8pm” Seifer says and then starts to walk back from the way he emerged in the trees , rustling through them, as soon as Squall looked away Seifer was gone. He stood up and put his hands over his face and tried to collect his emotions. He had opened up, and Seifer had... wanted to see him again. What did it mean? Was it okay? What would they talk about... Squall felt nervous and shaken up by Seifer all the way back to Balamb garden’s center he didn’t think of Rinoa once upon getting back to their shared place in Balamb Garden, their actual home was farther out closer to the Fire Cavern and protected by magic , no one officially knew where they lived if they had gatherings they had them inside of Balamb Garden. 

Squall pulled out his keys and opened the door to the very lush penthouse He and Rinoa shared. He’d seen Rinoa’s shoes in the fancy shoe rack they had near the door. Squall has eased in the House, not taking off his jacket , he went to a closet to put his sword back into its chest , it didn’t need to be shined or sharpened because he had done so the night before. He heard small foot steps come from behind him. He didn’t panic he knew it was her. Suddenly there was a tap on his back Squall turned around. It was Rinoa.

“So where were you?” Rinoa asked sweetly, but Squall knew it was a front. She’d been irritated that he’d left her not waiting outside the building faithfully. He turned slowly and decided to just answer her honestly.

“I was bored.” He says bluntly. She shakes her head. Rinoa moves a little closer. Squall turns his head to the side.

“So where did you go?” Rinoa asked a little bit more firm, frustrated that Squall didn’t answer the first time. Squall just stays quiet not responding and walks passes her. In his mind he felt sort of attacked and a little trapped he wasn’t allowed to just walk a little outside the garden and see some damn trees for maybe 45 minutes without Rinoa getting tense with him. That side came out when she matured more. Rinoa started walking behind him and grabs his hand.

“You are my knight, you’re supposed to... to always be there...” She says starting to be choked in her throat, now here were the crocodile tears. Squall sighed and put her arms around her. It was like a play. 

“Don’t worry, I went just outside of Balamb and just checked out some nature. ” Squall said clarifying exactly where he was. She sighed.

“You’re so vague. Mysterious...” Rinoa said teasing Squall, Squall shrugged not really in a playful mood because that was just a roller coaster of emotions. He went off to busy himself making coffee while Rinoa got online doing god knows what cause Squall didn’t really look.

The rest of the night continued on and they’d found themselves in bed watching some old cheaply made movie about a skeleton ghost. Squall couldn’t relax. All he could think about was Seifer and tomorrow. Rinoa moved closer to Squall and kissed him. This got Squall out of his train of thought. He wasn’t happy he didn’t feel any drive to kiss her back. He really cared for Rinoa but, something about their interactions just felt like a chore. But she loved him and he loved her. He would be honest with his feelings tonight and let her know he wasn’t really in the mood for kissing or whatever else would happen.

“Rin, I’m not really in the mood.” Squall says while easing her away gently, he offered a smile. She looks down as if she’s taken a shot to the ego. Squall hugs Rinoa thinking maybe this is a good time to level with her. He continues talking.

“I’ve been feeling different lately, like ...”Squall starts and Rinoa cuts him off, breaking away from his hug.

“Uninterested. Bored” She says throwing a pillow at Squall. Squall’s confused at her sudden out burst. Rinoa turns around and looks him in his eyes almost glowing, but the catch was, she was. Squall couldn’t look away. He tried his hardest and a feeling of hopelessness that he felt once before washed over him.

“You will love me....you will love me.” Rinoa chanted. Before Squall could even react he felt clouded, and suddenly so tired. He fell into a deep sleep. Rinoa broke her gaze away from him , flinching. She hadn’t had to resort to this after the first time she’d cast this spell on Squall she was so sure it would last forever. But somehow It broke. 

“He’s a fighter, but he’s mine” She whispered to herself, kissing him and stroking his hair. She placed herself into his arms falling asleep next to him. Hoping that she’d never have to resort to this again.

To be continued

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Rinoa trippin y’all


	3. Koi

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seifer and Squall meet up again and some stuff goes down and look there’s Laguna.

Squall’s p.o.v

I’ve had the worst headache all day. But honestly today hasn’t been a bad day. The tension between Rinoa and I feels like it’s gone today. I feel at peace with the situation. She could never have manipulated me. Could she? I’m watching her from a far and all I see is the woman I want to protect and be with for the rest of my life. As corny as it sounds. I don’t know how I got to feel how I felt yesterday and the days before but, waking up with this sense of clarity and love, I regret having those thoughts. I regret disclosing them to Seifer, I feel like yesterday was a dream but I don’t know how to really let him know, he seemed really into it yesterday. It seems strange to just have this feeling of clarity all of a sudden.

That brings me back to yesterday, I had told Seifer I’d meet up with him, to discuss my doubts and feelings. Yeah nothing in that sentence even remotely sounded correct but shit here I am, waiting outside of Balamb in that same Forrest clearing that we ran into each other the day before. I told Rinoa I was meeting with Irvine and then told Irvine the truth. Just in case she asked. The rest of the my friends didn’t really hold too much of a grudge against Seifer. Only Rinoa and Zell. Zell because he never got on with Seifer and Rinoa well, she’s convinced everything back then that he did was with his own hatred. But I, I know him, he’d never go that far and harm us all without something really affecting him. He grew up just like us depending on the system, he’d never kill us and destroy SeeD purposely. At least that’s what I thought and hoped. I sorta liked Seifer and looked up to him. I’d never admit that shit, but it was true.  
He said around 8:00 I looked at my watch it was 8:10 pm. Seifer was late, maybe he was just making fun of me. I’d tell him today I was just in a bad place yesterday and then try to avoid contact for another two years. As soon as I finished my thought I heard rustling in the tree and suddenly Seifer appeared.

“Hey.” I said in the coolest way possibleMaking myself look like a jackass most likely Seifer just waved coolly. 

“Leonhart, follow me.” Seifer says without hesitation. I follow behind closely. We go through the trees for a bit but suddenly there’s a clearing and I see a motorcycle parked connecting to a road where you can leave Balamb area. Seifer doesn’t hesitate, he gets on the bike and waves his hand signaling me to get on his bike. I stop in my tracks. There was no way in hell I’d be caught dead on the back of Seifer Almasy’s bike. Catching me looking at him with a look of hell no. He shakes his head.

“Take the ride or leave it” Seifer says simply. I sighed and hopped on hoping for the least amount of awkwardness to transpired between us. He revved his motorcycle like the total smug bastard he was, and tried to pop a wheelie, panicking I grabbed on to him as to not fall, Seifer didn’t have a helmet with him it looked like , not surprising. He speeded and speeded for what seemed like forever. I’m not going to lie I was shook up even maybe praying to Hyne a bit. Not to say I was full out, but in my head here and there I was. We were many many miles out when I finally asked, 

“Where are we going?” I asked suddenly. Seifer laughed and slowed down a bit so the sound of the bike got quieter.

“To see your dad” Seifer says nonchalantly. My dad huh? Laguna who, I never decided to call dad on account of me never knowing him growing up was, the president of Esthar. Which meant that’s where we were going. I got lost in thought thinking about him. 

“Do you have like daddy issues or something ? Why so quiet, I don’t really want any excess drama?” Seifer says trying to be partly funny but being equally serious. 

“No but how could he help? Thats why I’m wondering why we are seeing Laguna.” I say letting him known in my own way that I think Laguna is extra. 

“To be honest, he’s the one that helped me, you know back then... when I lost myself.” Seifer says quieter as he goes on.

“How did he ?” I asked genuinely interested. Seifer shrugged.

“A bunch of science shit and just being nice to be honest.”Seifer says. I ended up not responding and zoning out listening to the wind as we went past sounds, nature and many familiar places I haven’t been back to since I was on my journey to defeat Ultimecia. It feels kinda nostalgic a bit, and it’s crazy to think how far things have come. I’m riding on the back of Seifer’s motorcycle going to go see my “Dad” life is wild. 

I kind of go in a trance, all I can see is the background and I hear the low rumbling of the motorcycle. There’s this mutual warm silence between Seifer and I. I feel good genuinely. I feel safe and I feel comfortable. The distance between be and Seifer sort of disappears and I’m sitting on the bike not caring if my arms are holding onto Seifer when he starts to speed up. 

I get so engrossed with the vibe, that I don’t even look at the time until we get to Esthar. It’s about 12 am. Rinoa is going to be pissed but I hardly ever do this. I decide to give her a call, it goes to voicemail. I don’t leave a message and just shoot her a text.  
“Hey you cool lover boy?” Seifer asks. I shrug. 

“I don’t know she hasn’t picked up the phone. Or responded” I respond , Seifer shoots me this look. It’s a dumbass crooked smile, I can’t help but want to laugh so I turn away. I won’t give him the satisfaction. Seifer brushes my non reaction off and walks up to a building I’ve never seen before.

There aren’t any guards around and it’s pretty desolate, just a small black building. Seifer knocks, I hear a familiar voice shout “COMING” and then a crashing sound. Yep it was Laguna. We wait for 30 seconds and he opens the door. Looking a lot more disheveled then I had seen him last , which was at some meeting. 

“Seifer, you brought Squall?” Laguna asked very surprised and I can’t help but think how strange it must be for him, no one knows that Seifer and I are on good terms except for a few. 

“Yeah I was hoping you could maybe run some of those tests on him you did for me.” Seifer says getting straight to the point. Tests huh? I have an idea where this is going. This is what he meant by science stuff, he must be able to tell if someone’s will has been affected. That must’ve been how he helped Seifer after ultimecia got him. This grabs my curiosity. 

“Come inside quickly.” Laguna says not making us wait any longer. When we are inside it’s very simple and practical , it looks like a comfy cottage, it’s a nice baby blue and white color scheme, very calming, super Laguna, he gestures for us to sit down. We do on the same couch and he sits in the chair across from us. I’m looking at the clock from my phone at this point and it’s 12:10 no response. 

“So guys... let me ask you... you think Squall’s been affected by a sorceress?” Laguna asks putting his hand up to his chin as if wrapping his head around it.

“Yes” Seifer responds, Laguna looks at me.

“I don’t know” I admit. Yesterday was weird, today I feel fine but I can’t ignore how strongly I felt about wanting to leave yesterday. Why is everything okay today. I love her so much, but why the last months have I doubted our love. It’s definitely worth checking.

“Is it Rinoa?” Laguna asks. I nod.

“Lover boy hasn’t been so in love.” Seifer adds. Laguna thinks some more.

“You sure like... you guys just aren’t falling out like ya know.... normal people ?” Laguna asks trying to normalize the situation. I shake my head.

“Today I’m completely in love with her. Yesterday I was venting to Seifer about how I didn’t feel right and I was confused and conflicted.” I admitted to the room and to myself. 

“Talk about a switch, well it couldn’t hurt to check you over follow me, okay? Laguna says as he walks into another room, he touches the wall and a door is revealed. Seifer is unphased, and I pretend like I’m not. We follow him down some stairs and I see a light blue tented lab. Laguna grabs his coat from a rack and puts it on, Seifer finds a seat and I’m left standing.

“Sit down in this seat for testing Squall” he says pointing to a chair in the middle of the room. I walk over and sit on a seat that looks patent leather and suddenly an automatic seat belt locks me in. 

“Don’t worry it’s not gonna hurt or nothing” Seifer says pointing to the chair. I nod at him. A helmet goes over my head after I’ve been locked in place.

“This test will check your brain waves for any magical alterations you could have experienced. Magic leaves these certain frequency in the brain that’s irregular” Laguna says as he turns on the machine. Suddenly I see light. It isn’t blinding but calming and as fast as it begins it ends, the chair unlatches and lets me free.

“Yeah I’m sorry son.” Laguna says almost immediately. I get up to look at Laguna’s monitor speechless , I don’t know what it means but there’s red all over the screen and fast waves. Seifer’s eyes widened. Before we could say anything Laguna continued. I’m enraged how could she do something like this....Rinoa.... cutting off my thoughts Laguna speaks.

“But there’s still hope, I still have Seifer’s test. Ultimecia affected him, if they are the same type of waves that I picked up from you, Rinoa may be innocent and you are just going through something. “ Laguna suggested. 

“You think Ultimecia may have used magic on his brain during the final fight?” Seifer asked curiously. Laguna nodded. I sigh and i hope that this is true. Rinoa wouldn’t do this to me.

“I hope so Rinoa is a kind woman, and also our current sorceress in power, if she’s using magic to manipulate my so-...I mean Squall then we will definitely have some problems in the future. “ Laguna says while typing in information.  
“Yeah who knows what else she could be doing.” Seifer muses as he shrugs making that same raggedy face from earlier. He’s referring to her not answering my call and I honestly don’t need that kind of negativity in my life even if it was funny, it wasn’t at the moment.  
“This’ll take while you guys can go upstairs, I gotta compare the waves, I’ve got some lemonade Ellone made a day ago.” Laguna says while still continuously typing. 

Seifer and I walk up the stairs and to the kitchen and look inside the fridge to see only lemonade. I’m stiff very on edge. We grab it pour a cup, drink it in silence til Seifer breaks the ice. 

“Leonhart, what are you gonna do if it doesn’t match up” Seifer asks nonchalantly as if he knows I’m on edge. I sigh.

“I don’t know, I don’t think I can go home tonight if I find out she’s been tricking me. I don’t know what I’d do. I love her...how could she do something like this. “ I admit. I can’t hold it back I’m scared. I’m angry at the thought of her betrayal. 

“I know how you feel, you start to question everything, you feel angry, you feel weak.you feel so used.” Seifer says looking away from me. I can’t speak I look down at the tile kitchen floor, I set down my cup on the counter. Seifer continues.

“I don’t want that for you. Not for anyone. I want so badly for what you have to be real.” Seifer says, eyes full of concern. Looking at him, scar mirroring mine. I think I can finally understand just how heavy the past years have been for Seifer. The pain shows on his face finally his cool exterior dropping. I’m jealous. I wish I could be honest with myself like he was. Maybe for a moment I can be. I’ll try it.

“Seifer, thank you” I say genuinely putting my hand on his shoulder. I’m taken by surprise when my action is met with a tight hug from Seifer. Something I don’t think either of us was expecting to happen. It’s silent for a few seconds and neither of us lets go, until we hear a “SHIT” from the basement lab followed by running feet coming up the stairs. We see Laguna and he looks over and takes a deep breath before talking.

“Come look at this please.” Laguna says. We all follow Laguna back into the lab and circle around the computer. Laguna speaks.

“I’m so sorry. These aren’t Ultimecia’s waves. One is very strong, I think that this spell is recent. But I sort of think that until we have solid proof we shouldn’t accuse Rino” Laguna says. 

“How will we get proof?” I ask. 

“First I’m going to give your brain a shock to alter the magical wave and give you a premade spell made by Ellone to take that will work in two ways to get rid of your magical alteration.” Laguna says. 

“And then?” I ask. Laguna asks.

“The next part I will need Seifer for because being a political figure I can’t make enemies with the sorceress.” Laguna says. Seifer and I both nod.

“Okay I have nothing to lose I’m already a outlaw.” Seifer agrees. Internally I’m happy he’s here for me.

“After I fix Squall’s brain, I want you to follow him home and hide in the house. Squall, confront Rinoa. See how she acts after you mention the spell. If you see any sign of her casting a spell, Seifer, get Squall out of there and take him home with you, you can’t bring him here again,but contact me. If nothing happens then I don’t know where this magic wave came from and we will continue investigating. “ Laguna explains while our eyes completely focused on him. 

“She’ll see me then, Squall will be wanted for knowing where I am and not reporting me. That’s treason” Seifer says a little worked up. I understand him worrying he said he didn’t want me to end up like him. But if it’s true then there’s no choice, I’m more worried about him. 

“I can’t let him do that for me. If he’s discovered it’ll make it hard to him to keep living quietly.” I point out. This is my problem I don’t want Seifer to suffer anymore.

“Leonhart, Don’t worry about me, I’m worried about you-“Seifer starts but he’s interrupted by Laguna’s laughter, we both look at him confused.

“Hahaha you kids are something else... look if she really is misusing her magic, she’s not fit for her position. We will have to take her down just like Adel. And she will be tried for her emotional crimes against my son. You two will be fine. I’ll see to that myself.” Laguna says confidently.

“Seifer will have your protection?” I ask. Laguna nods abruptly.

“Seifer has always had my protection.” Laguna answers confidently.

“Let’s get started then.” Seifer says.

I look at my clock and it’s 2:33 am.

To be continued

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Laguna said the Son word awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww


	4. Tell me you love me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tell me it’ll be okay

The ride home was long, the atmosphere didn’t feel smooth as it did earlier in the night. The air was heavy between the two men, Squall had a lot on his mind. It was a long trip home and it was hard to want to continue.Squall didn’t know if he could handle seeing Rinoa again after learning that she’s been manipulating his mind. He really cared for her in the past and now that he learned that he was manipulated, he thinks to himself, what was real? What wasn’t? Who am I? Until suddenly he says 

“Who am I?” Squall says. Not knowing that Seifer was listening. Seifer responds. 

“You’re you. Squall Leonhart, a chic, no hearted, prideful lion.” Seifer responds Cooley. Squall frowned at this.

“Am I?” Squall asked in defense. 

“But you care about things, sometimes things it would be easier to ignore. “ Seifer added. He continued.

“That’s why no matter what happens here, despite our history or how awkward our meeting may seem, I’m with you Leonhart, I hate the idea of you being controlled. I never would wish the confusion and pain I felt on anyone ,you just feel so...” 

“Used. “ Squall said finishing the thought. There was silence for a bit ,the cold night wind blowing as the bike trekked on and on to their far destination. Squall’s head was so full of worry but he felt safe and comforted by Seifer’s words offering him the piece of mind to finally gather how thankful he was for Seifer’s presence. 

“Thank you Seifer.” Squall said quietly. He could feel Seifer tense up. The bike swerved a little bit and Squall ending up grabbing onto Seifer 

“Cmon man you’re not supposed to get soft for me just cause I’m helping you,it’s freaky.” Seifer says feeling shaken up. Squall signed. He didn’t know if it was because it was late or the fact that a lot had happened tonight but he was going to speak his mind and get out of his box, he put a lot into saying thank you Seifer was going to accept it, or it bothered him.

“You are saving my mind and I’m not supposed to say thanks?” Squall questions with a glare.

“I’m not used to it okay? I’ve always.... I mean.” Seifer starts but stops. Squall is confused and doesn’t really understand. What is he saying? 

“What?” Squall asks. Seifer curses. There’s a break when suddenly Seifer comes clean. 

“Ever since we were kids I’ve always wanted to get a reaction out of you.” Seifer responded finally.

“Wow so you picked fights with me?” Squall asked.

“It was the only time I could get a reaction. When we fought, my blood boiled, I felt fear , it was a real challenge. Something about that I wanted over and over.” Seifer says smiling slightly to himself.

“You’re psycho” Squall says bluntly.

“You are too l, you fought me every time without fail” Seifer responded coolly. Squall became embarrassed and faltered. He couldn’t respond, he had used all his courage up. Seifer had him. Squall loved the challenge of their school fights, wither he wanted to admit it or not. So he responded back with the only thing he could manage which was 

“So.” And Squall turned away to look at the passing night.

When they got back to Balamb it was still dark outside due to the close fall solstice. It was near 6:38 am. Both men carefully and quietly got off the bike, where they parked it carefully outside Squall and Rinoa’s shared. penthouse near the trees, sort of hiding it.

They didn’t really know how it would go. But they knew if they had to they’d get the hell out of there at any cost. They knew they’d run the risk of Seifer getting caught on camera, but it was something they’d have to live with. If Rinoa was in fact altering his mind, it’d be a small problem to get caught on video, no way she would let Seifer being there go. 

“Seifer, climb up on that balcony and wait for a knock, if you hear a knock at the window leading outside back me up.” Squall said pointing to the near balcony.

“Sure, no problem, but what if you don’t knock? Do I wait here the rest of my life while you play house?” Seifer asked with a hint sarcasm in his voice. Squall shrugged.

“Wait for 15 minutes, if nothing happens, I’ll come outside.”

“Sure let me just set a timer with an alarm” Seifer joked. Squall shook his head and walked up to the entrance, put in his key, entered the key. He was nervous and moving slow, but feeling like he was wasting time , he tried to hurry.

Upon entering Squall hears Rinoa, talking and laughing, he hears Sephie as well and sighs. He walks into the living room not taking off his signature leather coat. Both girls look at Him and he speaks.

“Selphie, I’d like to talk to Rinoa alone.” Squall says blankly not cutting any corners.

“Yeah okaaaaaay” Sephie response seeing the look on Squall’s face, she grabs her handbag and darts to the door closing it behind her. 

“You’re really home late tonight, I needed some company so I invited Selphie over, you know how we get the talking.” Rinoa says, Squall is halfway listening, he’s only got one thing on his mind.

“Rinoa, come here, can I ask you something ?” Squall asked flatly, Rinoa’s face drops and it turns serious.

“Yes...Alright about?” Rinoa responds slowly. Squall grabs her hand gently and walks her to the back room. Squall looks at the walls of his shared apartment hoping that this wouldn’t be the last time he’d see them. He looked at her small hand inside of his. There was no comfort, only unease. Finally they make their way to their shared room. 

“Rinoa I’m just going to be honest with you. I found out that someone has been using magic to manipulate me. You’re the only one I know with the kind of magic to do this. Rinoa... I thought our love was true. I was always ready to risk my life for you. To know it might not be real, I don’t know what to do now.” Squall can’t look at her. 

“Squall, I....” Rinoa looked down. Before she could even respond Squall interrupted.

“Answer me. Right now” Squall grabbed his sword out of the corner of the room he’d left it in the previous night. Rinoa’s face tensed up.

“I did. Why wouldn’t I?” She says simply. Squall feels his test tighten. He tries to speak he can’t say a word. 

“If I can have what I want...WHY WOULDN’T I?” Rinoa was starting to lose her composure. Squall is stunned, but he realizes he’s got to get out of there.

“I’m leaving” Squall finally says. Rinoa grabs Squall by the arm digging her nails in his arm. Squall shakes her off, suddenly he feels an ice shard stabbing in his side. Squall pushes Rinoa , stumbling a bit to the floor. He edges towards the balcony window where Seifer would hear him. Rinoa summons another blizzard attack. Squall gets up and grabs the screen to the balcony. He doesn’t want to hurt Rinoa, only to leave without having to retaliate. 

Squall quickly opens the door to the balcony, Seifer is already there. Rinoa rushes after Squall until she notices Seifer. Her ice halts for a moment. 

“Y-you...” she starts, she continues her face turning blank.

“You said you didn’t know where he was, that you never found him.” She continues to speak and process the man in her view, while rage builds inside of her. Squall could never tell Rinoa that he’d met with Seifer, in the past he’d protected him by dismissing it every rare time she brought him up. He knew she was doing him wrong, but still guilt swelled. Seifer saw this and answered for Squall grabbing his hand, He decided to take a gutsy move to make Rinoa’s blood boil.

“He’s had his secrets , you’ve had yours.” Seifer said simply. Squall looked down, Seifer grabbed Squall’s sword he’d dropped when the ice struck and started running toward the door. Rinoa blindly started throwing ice left and right, the men ran to what seemed like took forever to get to the door. Rinoa in blind raged used simple advanced spells, so that honestly helped a lot with their escape. Otherwise they’d have much more trouble running from the sorceress. 

To Squall all of this was like a daze, all he could hear is Rinoa yelling and ice hitting things , all he could see is Seifer smiling, holding his hand and leading him out the door, as his, now old apartment was being torn up.   
Finally he could feel the cool fall air, they were running outside to the back of the building,Seifer saw his bike and quickly got on, Squall following him a beat behind. Nothing was said between them, they drove and drove. 

Squall didn’t know how to feel. He felt angry at Rinoa for manipulating him, he felt sad over the loss of someone he knew and grew with for so long, he felt blessed to be finally free. He felt grateful to have Seifer by his side. He felt so confused and out of place that Seifer was the one who opened his eyes and helped him along with Laguna. But most of all he felt fear of a uncertain future. 

Squall was snapped out of his thoughts when suddenly he heard sirens from Balamb Seifer snickered.

“How much you wanna bet your Sorceress just called SeeD on us.” Seifer said, Squall couldn’t see his face but he definitely heard the dumb smile on his face. Squall knew he was right.

“There’s no guessing or betting, it’s a fact.” Squall said with a sigh. He knew this would happen in the back of his mind. Going against her, a Sorceress, was like treason to the state. Squall hadn’t harmed Rinoa, but considering he had Seifer with him , that was a crime in itself, to hide information, to know sorta where Seifer was. But something tells him, even if he hadn’t hid his seeing Seifer from her , she would’ve still called SeeD. She’d stop at nothing to hide her lie. If her manipulation got out, the public might not trust her anymore. 

“So are you going to fight back? They’re hot on our trail.” Seifer asks squall can’t really pick up Seifer’s tone or emotion. It runs him cold a little. 

“Hell yeah I will. I’m not going to get executed over a break up.” Squall says simply.

“ Oh so now you’re broken up?” Seifer asks with a laugh. Squall scowls. 

“...Yeah” Squall answers like Seifer had said the most childish thing.

“I didn’t hear you break up with her” Seifer teases. Squall groans. But then he begins to think, what if she thinks they are just having a fight. This worries him. He’s never broken up with anyone before.

“...Do I have to tell her?” Squall asks nervously. Seifer instantly laughs. Squall feels dumb. 

“I mean, sometimes having a spell put on you and having blizzard spells thrown your way is a normal part of a relationship if you can get past it .”Seifer says straightly. What Squall didn’t know was, Seifer was smiling sarcasm filled his tone.

“I don’t want that I’m breaking up with her” Squall says bluntly. He pulls out his phone and calls Rinoa. He thought she wouldn’t pick up and when she does, his heart sinks, he hears her crying , panting, he feels sorry for her for a second before he regains his resolves.

“We’re through Rinoa, how could you manipulate me like that?” Squall spoke into phone talking a little louder on account of the motorbike. Rinoa stops crying and speaks.

“Because I love you, I was scared, I wanted us to be happy forever. Come back Squall...” Rinoa starts to whimper again. Squall sighs. He starts to feel enraged , but trying his best to be civil he breaths in and out. Deciding that being confrontational would do more harm than good in this situation.

“You can’t just decide that I wanna be happy with you forever. That’s not how life works. You used me, I can’t come back to you, the way you acted, I’m not even attracted you.” Squall answers letting all of his inner thoughts pour out finally.

“You’ll come back, you’ll open your eyes.”Rinoa says sweetly, she hangs up the phone and Squall is left feeling empty, he forgets where he is for a second, blinks then realizes that he’s on the back of Seifer’s bike speeding down through a field in the middle of nowhere as fast as a whip. Squall felt tired looking at the grass and dark skies, but at the same time he was kept awake but the cool night air. Seifer suddenly pulls over behind a few trees and parks. Squall is confused.

“Why’d we stop” Squall asks looking up at Seifer who had already stepped off of the bike.  
“I thought you would be cold... so take my jacket.” Seifer said looking away, squall couldn’t really see his expression. 

“I have mine...” Squall answered raising his eyebrows. 

“Look leonhart. You’ve had a rough day you should get some rest. My jacket is really long on you, use it as a blanket or whatever.” Seifer said finally making eye contact, voice sounding aggressive. 

“Fall asleep on your back on a motorcycle?” Squall said eyes squinting. That was bizarre, for a second Squall felt kind of vulnerable, but he had no other options at the moment.

“Look don’t make it weird” Seifer says. Squall nods legitimately too tired to make it weird. Squall drifts off into a strangely quick still slumber as the cool fall air hits his face, Seifer cuts through it as he digs his face deeper into his back. Sleep comes to take him.

Seifer can’t help but laugh quietly to himself.

“I already made it weird” Seifer says to himself quietly. 

To be continued

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Seifer is sus

**Author's Note:**

> Lets see where this takes us. The next chapter will be in third person. All odds will be squalls POV and the evens will be in third.


End file.
